I am getting married in a few months. My co-workers have asked about the date but I have been cagey as I don't have the space, money or desire to invite them to my wedding. A recently married co-worker asked the whole team, which sets a precedent that I'm expected to follow. I have thought about inviting them to the ceremony only, but friends warn me that it's all or nothing. If I invite them, should I ask management? And if not, what will be the consequences?

Analyst, female, 25

It sounds as if you are suffering from a common pre-traumatic stress disorder that affects those who are about to get married. Sufferers find themselves waking in a cold sweat fretting over seating plans and whether the floral display matches the borders on the invitations.